What Paul Reiser’s “Aliens” Action Figure Means for Fans of “Diner”
A Handy Guide to Amassing Your Own Collection of “Diner” Action Figures
A few months ago, the world became one step closer to finally achieving closure on the last unfinished business of 1980s pop culture.
After being announced back in January, the 7-inch-tall likeness of Paul Reiser finally hit store shelves by way of an Aliens action figure.
When collectible company NECA first announced its “Hadley’s Hope” set for the 1986 sci-fi horror flick back in June, the press made note of the release being the Mad About You star’s plastic debut — as did Reiser himself:
While admittedly exciting, the real significance of this news has gone uncovered: We’re inching ever closer to a full set of action figures for the 1982 cult classic movie Diner.
With NECA having released a set of Home Alone action figures back in 2015 that includes a likeness of Daniel Stern’s “Marv”, it’s only natural to wonder if this is what the company has been subversively building toward all along.
Think about it: Is it really a stretch to believe that a rogue member of the NECA creative team might be hell-bent on paying tribute to his favorite coming-of-age film despite staunch disapproval from more level-headed, mainstream executives who are adamant that there’s no room on shelves for characters from a ‘50s-set ‘80s-flick; and that if Rain Main didn’t deserve a line of action figures, then certainly no other Barry Levinson movie needed them, either?
So is NECA looking to enter the coming-of-age collectible game with more 7"-scale stars of Diner? And if so, do they plan to offer the current owners of Paul Reiser and/or Daniel Stern figures a Diner expansion pack?
Only time will tell.
But while Diner fans are left waiting in the wings for an official release of character action figures, you can consider these other options for rounding out a makeshift collection of the Fells Point Six:
MICKEY ROURKE (“Boogie”):
Surprisingly, Rourke was the first of the gang to have his legacy made permanent with the honor of a mini molded self. As it turns out, there’s a whole slew of Mickey Rourkes are available as the character Marv from Sin City. (This is not to be confused with Stern’s “Marv” character from Home Alone, although a separate thinkpiece about the influence of 1990's Home Alone on 1991’s Sin City graphic novel, and the subsequent influence of that publication on Marv’s seedier portrayal in 1992’s Home Alone II, is certainly warranted.)
Rourke’s likeness of Marv is available not only in multiple sizes, but in multiple colors as well: as a full-color action figure, or as a black-and-white version to reflect the film’s color palette. You can even choose between Bloody Marvs and non-bloody Marvs (which are still usually pretty bloody).
Here’s where things get tricky, though: Mickey Rourke’s Sin City figure doesn’t quite look like the real-life Rourke’s. In Sin City, Marv’s face was, by design, pretty broken. Then again, so is Rourke’s. Thanks to a stint in boxing and subsequent facial reconstruction surgeries, Rourke’s face doesn’t quite look like the real-life Rourke from Diner, either — though in recent years, it has been closer than ever before. So the choice is yours: Would you rather the more misshapen Rourke from Sin City, or the somewhat closer-to-classic Rourke face of his Whiplash character from Iron Man 2?
For the sake of resemblance, let’s pull the trigger on Whiplash. While Boogie never strolled around Baltimore wearing an inmate jumpsuit and Arc Reactor-powered whips in Diner, who’s to say it’s not canon?
STEVE GUTTENBERG (“Eddie”):
As excited as Reiser (“Modell”) was to be molded into figurine form, even he would probably tell you that Modell wouldn’t bother making a Diner trip if he didn’t have an Eddie to steal sandwiches from— Every gang needs a Guttenberg.
Though not quite a perfect match, this Police Academy likeness of Steve Guttenberg as an undercover Carey Mahoney will have to do the trick. (If you can’t track that down, perhaps you’ll settle for the grinning uniformed version.)
TIM DALY (“Billy”):
This is a tough one. While America waits for the Wings product line we have long deserved, the closest thing to an option for any Tim Daly action figure at all is this cartoon Superman from Superman: The Animated Series, in which Daly voiced the titular hero from 1996–2000. If it helps, why not pretend the giant “S” on his chest stands for [INSERT DINER REFERENCE]?
And since this set you’re accumulating is no longer true to scale, you might want to consider going wild on the Daniel Stern (“Shrevie”) front, swapping out NECA’s Marv for the Funko Pop! vinyl version.
Of course, no Marv/Shrevie would be complete without a “Beth” by his side. Alas, Ellen Barkin hasn’t yet been enshrined in the world of toys and collectibles in any capacity.
But above all that, the most surprising void is left by the lack of a “Fenwick.” It’s impossible to ignore the crying shame — arguably some sort of federal crime, even — that Kevin Bacon has not yet been immortalized in plastic. The most logical route to the toy market for Mr. Bacon would of course be his role as Val McKee in Tremors — but even if the upcoming Tremors follow-up series doesn’t build enough hype to warrant a line of action figures, collectibles for Footloose and Apollo 13 still seem long overdue.
Heck, just give us the family from My Dog Skip at this point.
